This is a start of a new beggining!

Happy new year. I think this year is the start of a new beggining. A chance to start over and fresh, and leave the past behind me. Im excited to see what the new year brings in store. Including the things that are already changing. I have became apart of a new barn and am taking english lessons currenly and am going to be able to compete in a year, which is one of my goals. I have recently found out that i have a passion for modern dance, i absolutly love it. And I am discovering who i really am little by little.

Some of my new year resolutions:

-Go to happy trials more often
-Put my full effort in things that are important to me
-Dont give up when i get angry or feel like i cant do something
-chase my dreams and dont let things get in the way of following them
-If i dicide to do something go full out and do it
-If im chasing after somthing or have a task to do or something do it for myself and not for others, not bc they told me to
-Give a little more
-Dont refuse to do something that i cant
-Try something new and diffrent everyonce in a while, from food to an activity
-Do what im afraid of
-Laugh more
-Stay in contact with the people i love a little more often
-Try modern dance a little more
-Every lesson at my new barn give 200%
-Pause and take a deep breath everyonce in a while
-slow down
-Get on the varsity volleyball team
-Continue with club volleyball
-Get my jump serve down
-Dont be afraid to ask for help
-Try my hardest in school and as long as i try my hardest thats all i can give no matter what grade it is
-Write more
-Draw more
-Eat more fruit and vegtibles and CHOCOLATE
-Relax, take a break everyonce in a while
-Dont let things pile up, take one thing at a time- SLOW DOWN
-go with the flow
-Keep going on my journey wherever it takes me
-Keep finding out who i am
-Stay true to myself

These are them so far... i hope i accomplish them all and i want to add to them im really excited for this year. My main goal is to just follow my dreams and my heart dont let somthing hold me down from what i love to do.

<3's Always M.(maddy rae)

Nutella + Pretzels

"Cousins make the best, best friends"- Uknown

Anna came to visit during thanksgiving and boy did we have a blast. We did so many great things and we got alot closer. We did alot of shopping and took tons of pics, THANKS AUNT ANGIE! they turned out so cool! Ill post some later! It was really nice having a sister for 5 days! Oh and dont forget all the nutella and pretzels and SCARY movies... we had alot of those three! We love the nutella and pretzels, i went on a pretzel diet! I miss her already... i need her. COME BACK! ill come up there soon! I luv you, dont ever forget it! Im always here!

<3's Always
M.

Whisper in the Wind

A stampede forms,
Just as the sun is setting.
They move to the music of the wind.

As they run,
You can see their mane flapping
To the beat of the song.

They look so peaceful.
Every movement-
So precise, so perfect, so elegant.

They run across the sand,
Across the water;
So beautiful, motionless.

Like you’re looking at a picture,
About to be taken but once you take it,
The image is gone.

And it takes your breath away.

Once night fall comes
You feel their presence
Of their soul and spirit.

But as you look back.

All that’s left of them are
Hoof prints in the sand,
Hoof prints on your heart
And the whisper in the wind.


-This is a poem i wrote in class. I was thinking about horses and the ranch and just wrote it during journal time. Planning to go to the ranch tomorrow. Havnt been there in so long i miss all of them so so much. Hope all goes well tomorrow. Ill let you guys know.

<3'sAlways
M.

An Old Farmers Advice:

So i was on facebook and i saw that somebody had wrote a note that said: An old farmers advice. So i decided to read it. It had spoke and made alot of sense to me, expeccally because its by a farmer and i used to go to a ranch for 4 years or so.....

* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight
And bull-strong.

* Keep skunks and bankers at a
Distance.

* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a
John Deere tractor.

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.

* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner
Than you.

* It don't take a very big person to carry a
Grudge.

* You cannot unsay a cruel word.

* Every path has a few puddles.

* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

* The best sermons are lived, not preached.

* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't

Never gonna happen anyway.

* Don't judge folks by their relatives.

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best
Answer.

* Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get
Older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.

* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't

Botherin you none.

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a

Rain dance.

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever
Have to deal with, watches you from

The mirror every mornin'.

* Always drink upstream from the herd.

* Good judgment comes from experience, and a
Lotta that comes from bad judgment.

* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot
Easier than puttin' it back in.

* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some
Influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

So there ya have it. Hope it made sense to you or you got at least something from it. Maybe you learned a little more about who i am by reading this, whoever I might be........

<3's Always
M.

Good or bad?

So I'm reading this book right well this other book I havnt even finished it I have about seventy none pages left but I got this other book and now I can't stop reading it. So I'm not going to tell u the name of it bc I dont know just because. Well anyways the book is basicly snout a singer/song writers life so far and she wrote the book herself. In the book she talks about alot of metaphors and things she has thought about life. I'm almost half way done eith the book and I got it yesterday but it's really meaningful and is making me think alot with what is going on around me right now.

There's ALOT going on right now that I can't really explain but, that's high school for ya......right? Anyways there's so many things happening that I would have never imagened would happen. It basicly feels like everything is falling apart. Like on the fall when all the leaves fall off the tree and then sprout again with whole new leaves. But I guess that has to happen every once in a while to keep the balance in things and it's not necicarlly a bad thing I don't think. Through all of this I think I learned alot, changed alot, and got one step closer to finding out who I am. Not knowing weither if it's good of bad.

<3's always
M.

Seperate ways

" every girl needs a best friend to make her laugh when she feels like she will never smile again. "- unkown

There is so many best friend qoutes that I love this one just stuck out to me. Let's all admit we have been here, we all have though that nothing could ever get worse but, in the end the person who always brings us back to life is our best friend. We all have that one special friend that can make everything better and auto matically knows when something is wrong even when you have the biggest smile on your face. They always know the truth and tell you the things you don't want to tell yourself. There's just something about best friends that make them so special. There's only that special person who can come around once in a life time. We all just need to enjoy every moment with them and every second and never forget all the memories because they cango away in a second. It takes years to build trust and seconds to destroy it. We all need to be thankful for our best friends and never take them for granted. Though friends do move on I think vest friends will be there forever no matter what. Even though you may never talk our even keep in touch for a couple years and go your seperate ways you know they will always be there. You know that they just can't walk away after everything you guys gave been through.

Once best friends, always best friends.

<3,s always
M.

Where o where are u anna?

"cousins make the best, best friends."

I miss my cousin Anna so much. We are really close we are more than just cousins we are best friends. She is being a forgin exchange student from Germany for a year in minisota and when I went up there this summer I spent a lot time with her and we just clicked. I wish I lived near her so we could spend a lot more time with eachother but I think that is the thing that makes us so close. We do talk to eachother alot at least once a week and she is going to be coming to San Diego real soon and we are sooooooo excited!!!!! We are going to have a blast. You have no idea how much I miss her it's like pure agony waiting to see her again. I know she misses me so much too. When we talk on the phone it is so hard to say goodbye and then two seconds later we revive a txt message from eachother. We are inserpritable and are going to be best friends forever!!!! Maybe in a couple years after she goes back to germany she wants me to visit and so do I. She wants to show me aroud her home and I want to show her mine too. So anna hurry up and get her before I go crazy!!!!

Miss ya and luv ya soooo much!!!!

<3's Always
M.

Fifteen

"And when you're fifteen, don't forget to look before you fall
Ive found that time can heal most anything
And you just might find who you're supposed to be
I didn't know who I was supposed to be at fifteen"- Taylor Swift

So i recently turned fifteen this past tuesday. Tuesday was fairly busy for me. I had a volleyball game and school and didn't get home till late then it was straight to my homework. But the past weekend i celebrated with family and had a blast, it was so fun. On wednesday i went to corvet diner with my two best friends. This weekend i think im going to do something with my aunt angie which is always fun. My birthday was fun and i still cant wrap my head around the fact that it was my birthday and that i am fifteen but i did enjoy myself. There is only one thing that would of made my birthday totally perfect, but what eles can you expect.....

Fifteen is a song written by Taylor swift. I love that song expecaily sense now that I am fifteen I can totally relate to it. In my perspective what the song means to me is that even though your fifteen it is just the beggining and you have to be careful about everthing. That in life your going to get hurt and that there is going to be alot of chalanges but to always keep going. To slow down and that you don't have to figure out everything right away because you still have alot of time........ Just slow down and take a deep breath.

Overall I'm looking forward to my fifteen year and all the things it brings.

<3's always
m.

Who am I?

Below is my recent assignment i had for class. We had to answer these there questions: Who am I? What am i doing here? and How should i act? When i first got this assignment i had no idea what i was going to do. I asked Rachel and she just laughed and told me she couldnt help me haha not really she did help me alot, she always does but i knew she wanted to laugh haha. I thought about this assignment all day and finally when it came to write it i still didnt know the answers to the questions.

Maddy
Peter Jana
Henry G’s
9/9/09

Who Am I Philosophy Assignment

Who am I? If I first got asked that question I would say “Maddy.” Then I would think about it more, who is Maddy? After I thought about it for hours I would answer “I don’t know!” I don’t know who I am or what I am or what I want to become. I know the way I want to act and behave but, I don’t know me. I want to act nice, kind, caring and always do the right thing, while thinking about others first before me. I don’t know what the purpose is of me being here alive today but, I do know that I want to find that answer in the future. I do know that I want to become somebody, somebody that is positive and a role model to others, while at the same time very important. I don’t just want to be apart of a crowd, I want to stick out in it too. There’s this quote that says “I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” I don’t want to be that person who can relate to that quote in ten years. I want to be the person who says “I’m glad I figured out what I wanted to do in the past and have accomplished it now.” Even though right now it’s looking like I will be relating to that quote in ten years, I’m going to change it. I’m going to figure out who I am, what I am, what I’m doing here and what I want to become.



>end<


As you can see i still have a long journey ahead of me and i hope to find the answers of these questions. As my aunt shirley said you just have to figure out what you want and stay true to yourself and never sell yourself short or doubt yourself. She is a great insperation and i dont know what i would do with out her. Luv you aunt shirley.

I hope you guys out there know who you are and its never to late to find out. The other question are teacher asked us was what we thought the meaning of life is. I dont know the answer to this question YET either but, i wonder if you guys do and what your guys answers are?

<3's Always
M.

Start of Sophomore Year

The beginning of a new year has so many knew adventures. I'm excited to see what is in store for this year and what new paths it will bring! For my first week of school so far its been going good, better than expected. I'm really happy with the teachers i got but still not sure about a couple of them. My teacher Julio who is the Spanish teacher is a little weird. I never understand him during class but he is helpful sometimes. Peter Jana who is my humanities teacher i am unsure of, he always has us do random things in the middle of class. Like play Simon says of shake our neighbors hand. To make things worse i sit right next to him!!!! My math and chemistry teachers name is Daisy Sharrock. I like her alot she helped me out a little bit last year in the resource room. This is her first year as a teacher and she wanted me in her class and i wanted to be in her class too. I think so far she is doing great! This past week was a little tiring and today just totally wiped me out. This year i am in the same team as my best friend amber which i am so happy about. I have also made some new friends. There is this one girl named Isabelle in my class and she just moved from Alabama which i think is so cool. Sarah is also a new girl and she plays volleyball with me too.

I had a choice to be on the Varsity team for volleyball and be a back row passer but i usually play setter. Or i could go on Junior Varsity and be the captain and setter and kinda run the team. I had a hard time making the decision and had no idea what i was going to do until five minutes before i had to come up with my choice i was going to pick Varsity but then the coach said if i play setter on the Junior Varsity this year and really work hard i would be able to make Varsity next year as the setter. So i am really excited to see what this volleyball season has in store!!! There is alot of first time players on my team so i am totally going to be working with them and getting them ready for the games. I really want to be really competitive this year and win some games while at the same time having fun. You guys better come see me play!

We will just have to wait and see what the rest of the school year brings in store!!!

<3's Always
M.

New Surfer Girls In Town!

Personally I'm not a big fan of the ocean. It creeps me out when you cant see the bottom of the ocean floor and at any given moment you have no idea what is going to happen.

I love to surf though. I love surfing with my aunt Angie, we are total surfer girls in a work of progress. I also like to surf with my friend amber, that is how i started surfing! The feeling when your on your board about to go over a wave that looks huge and you don't know if your going to go under, flip over, get toppled, or make it over. That burst of fear your get when the wave is coming towards you is so exhilarating. When your paddling with all your might hoping to catch this upcoming wave, not wanting to look back it fear of what you might see but, as soon as that wave carries you and your board and as you stand up it is the best feeling you can get out there! Or when you standing on your board and you realised you are standing to far up on it and it starts to tip forward and you know your going under and theres nothing you can do about it...... it kinda gets you even more determined to get the next wave you catch right. Or if you just in the water with no board and you gently rock over the waves going up and down like a roller coaster, or when a big wave is coming and you dive into it and feel the wave go through you under the water in your face, then you come up from out of the water not sure what your going to see. After a couple of times i do that i start to picture a shark right in front of me and that's when i know its tim to get out.

My favorite part about the beach is walking or running on the shore either with a friend or family member to talk or just yourself to gather you thoughts. Its the perfect place to think with the sound of the waves in the background or just to look for sea shells.

I never used to like the ocean but now I'm starting to like it a little more. Expeccally since its one of the things i get to do with my aunt! Everybody at the beach better watch out for the new surfer girls in town!

<3's Always
M.

Change

"If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it." ~Mary Engelbreit

I half and half agree with this quote.

I agree with it because:

1. i think if you don't like something you should change it, you shouldn't just wait for it to change on its out you have to do something yourself if you want it.

I disagree with it because:

1. If you cant change something it wont necessarily be good if you changed the way you thinked about it because then u could be throwing something away. Nobody probably knows what I'm talking about, but it do. You cant change your opinion on something and you definitely cant change a person...... But what if something didn't really change inside but it did on the outside it just looked different, it could be permanent or not.

If something changes either for the better or for the worst it has to be for a reason...... right?

<3's Always
M.

So what did u think of your trip, did u have fun, do you like it there?

So what did u think of your trip, did u have fun, do u like it there?

Everybody is asking me that lately. Hmmmm well yeah i had fun with my cousins and my aunts and uncles, but i came home early. Why you ask..... well i don't really do whys but it is because i got so scared i saw my life flash before me *wink*. But i was so scared. I can still hear the sirens in my head. They went off three times, that means walking up and down the basement stairs three times, freaking out three times, calling my mom and family and friends several times along with texting and resisting myself from opening the door and running down the street in panic *laugh.* So as the second alarm came on, i cracked and paniced and demanded that i wanted to come home. Just the memory of the sirens and sitting in that cold dark basement which wasn't really a basement is still freaking me out. The fact that it wasn't really a full on basement didn't make me feel safe at all. I don't even want to tell u my toughts about if the tornado came over the house, what would happen...... i don't even want to think about that anymore. Everybody keeps saying that it happends all the time and there is nothing to panic about, that people sit out side and watch it like its some kind of comedy show that they stay up all night to wait for it to come on, but in this cause it only comes on once a mouth. Telling me that a house roof being torn off and a bunch of trees being blown out of there roots, spin in the sky for a little while and then come back down isn't a big deal....... well then your just crazy. There were 3 tornado's that day.... 1 is way to many for me let alone 3.

Other than that i realy enjoyed hanging out with my cousins and met some new ones too. I enjoyed hanging out with my aunt Naomi too we had a blast, expeccally with her soon ( not really haha jk). The first couple of nights i slept over at Jodi's with Anna in her huge house which was soo cool. We had a blast and stayed up SOOO late. Me and Anna got matching pj shorts at TARGET( which im actually wearing right now) and we just instantly clicked. On my last night i slept over at Linnea's which was fun, i did some singing with her family which i loved. Her mom is so nice and sweet and we talked for a while her whole family is pretty cool, i enjoyed it and hope to keep in touch with all of them. Today me, Anna and Linnea all went to the mall of America and got matching scarfs and shopped and don't forget took a bunch of pictures, it was a BLAST. I'm definitely going to miss them, they have to come to sandiego. I definitely see us as the 3 cousins that are best friends forever! There is still some people i wish i could of seen, meet or hung out with them more. Oh well just means i will have to come again, ONLY IF IT IS NICE WEATHER THE WHOLE TIME. Hope everyone has fun at the reunion without me!

Overall the answer to your guys question is that i did like Minnesota i like it there a lot, its way different from sandiego i definitely liked the change. I just hate the tornado's. Maybe i can figure something out so i wont be so scared! Bye luv y'all and miss y'all, till next time!

<3's Always
M.

Extra Baggage

Why can us girls/ ladies never figure out what we are going to wear? Why does it take so long and why don't most guys have the same problem? It always takes me a long time to figure out what I'm going to wear unless i already know exactly what i want to wear and i know i absolutely like it.

Its the night before i go to Minnesota and the thing that has been on my mind the most is what I'm going to wear on the plane. I don't know if i want to wear jeans, sweats, yoga pants, shorts or a t-shirt, sweater, tank top etc. I have the same issue with packing i never lay out matching out fits i just through in clothes i like and hope i can find something that matches to wear when I'm on the trip. Same with like jewelry and activities i just take stuff and throw it in. I never use even half the things i pack when i go on trips.

I really hate this about myself because i know I'm a very organized person but when it comes to clothes and packing i cant figure it out. Its like my mind goes insane and it says " oh ya i could use that, or i like that throw it in." Even though in the back of my head i know I'm not going to use it I'm just adding extra weight to my baggage. =/

<3's Always
M.

Busy Busy Busy

So i have this calendar on my computer and i put all my things and stuff coming up that i do. This month is so packed from, volleyball and horse back riding to school starting and fun events from hanging out with my aunts and uncles to going to Minnesota. Just to think its going to get even busier with school starting. In September i am going to start acting again along with voice lessons for the musicals. Its going to be hard balancing school, volleyball, horses and acting/voice along with family and friends and don't forget just like cleaning my room and hanging with my dog and that kind of everyday stuff too. But i like being busy, i hate not being busy. If I'm not busy i HAVE to find something to do. I think being this busy will be good for me and i think i can totally handle it! I really want to make the varsity volleyball this year and we have tryouts starting tomorrow for three weeks, three days a week for three hours. But I'm missing three days of tryouts because I'm leaving to Minnesota. I really hope it wont effect what team i get on!!!! Well i have a really busy life ahead of me and i think I'm going to like it. I'm starting to hang out a lot more with like my aunts and uncles and cousins and i really like that and want to keep it up so it will definitely be apart of my busy schedule. Looking forward to it. Just hope it wont go wrong. Well I'm off to bed because i have to rest for tryouts tomorrow from 9-12 AM!!!!!!!!!

Goodnight everyone!

<3's Always
M.

Homeless Animals

"He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion."- Author Unknown



I always get sad when i see a homeless person with a homeless dog. I always feel bad for the dog because the dog cant do anything about it but the person could try and get a job. I always feel like hopping out of the car and taking the dog to a human society but, then again the dog is probably the man/women's best friend and the dog and the person would be really sad if they were separated. I would be really upset if my dog was taken away from me and i would do anything to make sure that wouldn't happen. I was talking to my aunt earlier and i asked her what she did today she said that she volunteered with washing homeless peoples dogs at an event that her friend put on. If they do the event again i would love to volunteer with my aunt next time. I feel like we should help with animals in anyway we can, they deserve to live and be happy just as much as humans.

<3's Always
M.

Black and White Photograpy

Recently I've been really interested in black and white photography. I really like the simple images or the images of roads and expressions. Threes so many great photographs i haven't found my absolute favorite black and white photo but I'm still looking for it. Here are a couple that i found that i really like:

Santosh Korthiwada- No peeping please
I really like this one because i like how it shows emotion and you can see just in his eyes what hes feeling.


Sally Mann- Candy Cigarette
In this one i like how it tells a story and it doesn't just show emotion but it shows beauty.


Unknown- Birds
In this photo it seems like it was taken at the exact angle, time and lighting. I love the concept of the photo it is definitely one of my favorites.


Unknown- Ghost Town Charm
In this photo i think it shows how something so run out and old still has a pretty side and can be a diamond in the ruff.


If i find my absolute favorite black and white photograph ill post it!!!

<3's Always
M.

Thinkin'

Right now I'm sitting in my room listening to Taylor Swift with the background sounds of the neighbors outside and my dog snoring. I am debating if i should watch one of my favorite movies or read a book called "the girls." I'm just thinking and reflecting on my day and think about things. I went to the ranch today and haven't been sense the first week of summer. I really miss it there, don't know why i haven't been in so long. It was really hot and a little boring but still fun to see everyone. I wanted to go see and say hi to all the horses i missed but didn't get a chance to.... oh well! Friday happy trails is going to be in a parade I'm not going but everybody i know is. While i was at the ranch i got a text that made my day and gave me a big smile. Nothing really new has happened. Friday i slept over at Amber's and we got locked out by her brother for two hours, and no we did not have our phones because we are stupid. We ended up drinking water out of the hose and were planning our survival plan if we had to sleep out there. Saturday amber and i babysat my cousins Finn and Scout they were perfect angles. Sunday we went to the Hilton with my aunt and uncle, i met my cousin Jordan for the first time which felt like i already knew her because we talk all the time. I saw my great uncle too who's in town, he is crazy.... in a good way. Monday i didn't do anything and here we are for today. I'm looking around my room at all the pictures and surprisingly there all horse pictures i have a couple non horse ones that i want to put up. I don't like just sitting here so I'm going to spell check this and go do something to keep me busy. Just wanted to put an update feels like i haven't posted in a while.

<3's Always
M,

The Best Day

On Saturday was Scouts birthday party. I wouldn't of missed it for the world. I also wanted to help out my Aunt Angie with things. It was a blast all the kids were so cute! There was a bubble machine that made thousands of bubbles a minute, a fish cake which was adorable and a bunch of things for the kids, and who could forget the hola hoops (Uncle Chris). I ended up sleeping over. We watched a movie but forget the name of it. It had a great plot which i liked but, it when kinda slow.

The next day we went surfing. It was fun me and Aunt Angie caught a couple waves together which was one of the things i wanted to do with her. She is such a great surfer, we both want to get alot better. We also went to concerts in the park in Pacific Beach which was really cool. I watched Finn, Scout and Aunt Angie dance which i wanted no part of. I am not a good dancer at all especially at those kind of events. When we got home from concerts in the park we played this really cool game i think is called "dirty laundry" its now one of my favorite games. You really get to know the person more and have a ton of laughs. I definitely learned more about Aunt Angie and I know she learned alot more about me too. We are definitely going to have to play it again!

In the middle of the day Me and Aunt Angie went to the Verizon store. We LOVE Taylor swift and we will sing her in the car. One of our favorite songs is "The Best Day!" Right before we got back home we were singing that song at the top of our lungs haha. We could listen to it over and over. I know there is going to be many more days that i will spend with her.

Yesterday was definitely one of "The Best Day" out of so many more with her.

Miss ya already.

<3's Always
M.

Thankz

I am so grateful for the little things.
For by best friend amber who is always there for me no matter what.
For getting random text messages from random people who wanted to just say hi.
For all the random things that happen at the ranch.
For the store trips me and zamm take.
For the random things Jess has to say or complain about ha ha just kidding she makes me laugh.
For everybody at the ranch.
For all the horses in the world.
For the random things me and my friends laugh about and then in the end we forget what we were laughing about.
For my auntie Diane and all the water trips i do for her because she is a mermaid and her text messages.
For my auntie Jenn who walks in at the most random times, who could forget that time in the spare bedroom when we were all laughing and she had no clue what was going on.
For my aunt Angie singing Taylor swift songs in the car and always having a good time with her.
For my aunt Noami and her laughing and always telling me the truth even though i don't believe her.
For my adding and multiplying and Zs and S's problem... OK not really.
For Rachel who makes me do all these things i don't want to do and just making me smile.
For Jessica and her random stories.
For all the stupid things my dog does.
For an awesome school, if i went to another school i wouldn't survive.
For Sarah and her sillyness and her childless with without it she wouldn't be Sarah but also at the same time her seriousness haha.
For chocolate and peanut butter.
For American idol on wii and getting booted of stage haha.
For facebook..even though its addicting.
For cowgirl boots and jeans.
For the movie flicka and no reservations.
For the stupid movies on lifetime that me and amber always watch.
For the random midnight talks on sleepovers that makes friends closer.
For falling off but always getting back on.
For that reassurance and hope you get every once in awhile that keeps you going.
For there being such a thing as cleaning and organizing.
For so many more things.
For my weirdness, craziness, scaredness and slowness.
And for spell check.... there was so many mistakes in this.. you don't even know.
For all the awesome people in my life i don't know what i would do without y'all.

<3's Always
M.

Aunts, Uncles, and Cousins

Lately Ive been really interested in my family, mostly my aunts, uncles and cousins. Ive been hanging a lot more with my uncle Chris and my aunt Angie. I used to hang out with them alot when i was younger and we had the best of times. We would go to the beach, park, zoo, drive-in movies, take loads of pictures and much more. I remember sleeping over at there house all the time. I always had fun with them no matter what we did, they were the best and still are. When they had Finn and scout we slowly stopped hanging out and seeing each other. I would occasionally see uncle Chris at school but not aunt Angie, Finn and scout. Recently Ive started hanging out with them more. Finn and Scout are so adorable and really fun. They are really cute and very intelligent. I really enjoy hanging out with them, Ive gone to the chula vista nature center, hanged out with them and some of my cousins on fourth of July weekend we went to the Hilton and surfed and me and aunt Angie sang Taylor swift songs in the car and she also took pictures which turned out great! I always text aunt angie and ask for her help on what to wear or just call her to say hi and talk to her. I'm glad were hanging out more and getting closer. I miss hanging out with them and i cant wait to make more fun memories with them. They are the best and always there and especially make me laugh. Luv you guys!

My aunt Naomi and i have also got closer. I remember seeing my aunt when she came to visit from Minnesota. I would only really remember her and uncle bob from all the rest but, i only thought of her as a aunt that i would never really get to know and as another family member just like all the others i couldn't keep track of. Though she did stick out in my head from all the rest of them. The one memory i had of her is when i had to do an essay and i couldn't find anything online about it she sat down with me and helped me with it. Recently we've been chatting and calling each other. I have learned alot more about her and she has learned alot more about me and has taught me so many things. She always brightens my day with a simple hi and always makes me smile. We have gotten alot closer and i never knew how much she loved me until she told me. She is an amazing person, and i cant wait to get even closer to her.

This summer i am going to Minnesota. I am actually excited about it, unlike all the other times i went when i was like six. All i remember is getting eaten alive by miskitos, after that i told myself i wasn't going to go ever again. Now i want to go 1 because i want to go to the family reunion and see everyone, 2 because i want to see all my aunts, uncles, cousins in person and hangout with them etc, 3 because my cousin Linnea and i have gotten really close and we've been chatting, i met her when i was little and i want to see her again and because my other cousin Anna is coming from Germany and we've also been talking and we all are going to have fun sleepovers and i cant wait! I am going alone and i have never been this excited to go on a trip to see family before. My cousins and i already have it planned out and are just waiting in agony until the date comes upon us. Its going to be fun and I'm really excited, and have been looking forward to it forever!!!!!! Cant wait to see y'all!

Overall I'm really excited about my trip and am really grateful for such awesome family members. Cant wait to hang out with all of them more! Luv y'all

<3's Always
M.

The up's and down's of nap's.

I woke up this morning at 6:55 with the TV along with the lights on with my computer wide open staring at me. I went back to sleep and got woke up by the text message of my mother seeing if i was awake. I flipped through the channels and watched Miss Congenitally 2. I started getting ready because Aunt Angie, Uncle Chris, Finn, and Scout and me where going to the chula vista nature preserve. It was fun my favorite part was the sea horses!I also liked the sting rays and the star fish! I did NOT like the snakes and the tarantula, freaky i was scared and to top it off uncle Chris kept scaring me with snake things. Overall it was really fun and i was glad i got to spend more time with them. This next weekend i hopefully will go to the beach with them and go surfing, FUN! I really miss the old days were we used to hang out A LOT, I'm just glad were hanging out more =).

When i got home i watched movies, and i guess i fell asleep around 2 and woke up a little past 6. The point is I CANT GO TO SLEEP NOW AND ITS 1:30 IN THE MORNING. Though Ive stayed up later, i am not the littlest tired right now. I am never taking naps ever again. The good part about the nap was i did catch up on some sleep because I've been really tired the past couple of days but, now its not really paying off. I'm also surprised in myself because i NEVER take naps, i hate naps, cause see what happeneds! It might also have something to do with the chocolate i had too at 9 o'clock, ha ha yummmm CHOCOLATE!!!!

Now I'm watching life time movies flipping from facebook and my phone..... maybe its time to go to bed wait I'm not tired. =( this is so sad. :'( ok I'm literally going to try and go to sleep. Good night or should i say good morning, sweet dreams.

<3's Always
M.

The end of STARLINGS

The end of this season of starlings for volleyball has come. Overall we got 35 place out of 50 teams or so at nationals. We didn't do so well but, there is always next year. Nationals was so cool there was a bunch of different teams from different states, it was so cool to see how many girls have the same interest and how we can all get along.

Overall I really enjoyed playing on my team. I really like my coach and she is the best coach i have ever had. She taught me so many things and not just in volleyball and i thank her for that. She did a great job and i hope i have her next year. I improved a lot and especially in my setting and i hope i can continue to keep playing that position, in the end i was really proud of myself. I was also really proud of myself in becoming CAPTAIN because i proved to myself i have what it takes and that i really put everything in everything i do. I made some new friends that I will keep in touch with. Cant wait till next year!





These are pictures taken at open ceremonies. Fun Times!
<3's Always
M.

Fearless

A couple days ago I learned what I'm mostly afraid of. I was thinking about it a lot and thought to myself why am I scared of that, that's a stupid thing to be afraid of. I realized that every one has a fear and that fearless means to have fears. Without fears we wouldn't be able to face them or learn from them. I have a lot of fears: I fear that all chocolate in the world will disappear, that country music is going to change into pop and rock, that an earth quake will make all horse shoes that are hanging up above a door turn upside down and create all the good luck they hold into bad luck, that the world will be controlled by kids, that the word friends wont have a definition or a meaning, that all mean people will turn nice because then we couldn't be the better person and do the right thing because everybody would be nice and you wouldn't even notice or have feelings-ok you get my point, that there will be no more easy buttons to push even though there annoying, that all the stupid things you and your friends talk about that you remember the most will already have been talked about, that no talking in library's rule will be over ruled, that when I'm riding the feeling of being free will go away, and that this list will never end.

Even though non of these is what i fear the most i still have a lot of fears and worries. Lets just say i worry a lot, but i just proved to myself that i am fearless. I will one day have more fears and have fears that i will accomplish and wont accomplish but, one thing is for sure, i will always be FEARLESS.

<3's Always
M.

Gullable- or however you spell it.

Open Ceremonies were tonight and let me tell you it was so FUN.

So Sarah picked me up and me, Sarah, Rachel, Nicole and Kara were in the car. We were on our way to open ceremonies for nationals and it was at sweet water high school. When we were driving we felt like we were the odd ones out. It was so scary and freaky down there. I was scared to go to the school because they said it looked really freaky and there mascot was the red devils. In the gym there was paintings and sculptures of the red devil. I was scared. The fun started when all the teams went on the gym floor and did the cha cha slide. There was other songs and dances that were on after and we were just waiting for the hoedown through down which didn't come on. =( While the coach's were having a meeting we sat on the floor talking about Napoleon dynamite and how I've never seen it. They just keep talking about haw funny and stupid it was. I asked if there was a point to the movie and they said no. I have to say they did really funny impressions.

When we were leaving we were out side and we all were trying to do an impression of how hood people or whatever you call them walk. Nicole did a really preppy walk and we started laughing and then me, Rachel and Kara started doing funny walks too. We turned around and Sarah had this weird look on her face. As we were walking back to the car we started singing Annie songs like tomorrow. It was so funny. In the mean time we almost got ran over by a truck, just kidding because Sarah said she would save us which is very nice of her and we thank her for that considering were are freaks. We were very careful as we were walking to the car, it was very very scary. In the mean time through out the whole time everyone was telling me and nicole how gullable we were and they were playing tricks on use which was so not cool. I really thought gullable wasnt in the dictionary because i looked it up and i couldnt fin it but then they proved me wrong and told me that i spelled it wrong.... who knew.

Were in the car at the gas station and I get this call from someone. So Rachel answers the phone and is talking to this someone and then everyone starts talking to this someone and everyone is saying hi. We told the someone that we were on a road trip and about to get disconnected, I felt bad. You guys were being kinda mean to the someone, its ok it was funny! Now the prank calls begins. We had one about someone calling 7-11 fourteen times and they wanted to sue them, we had one about making a reservation for a honeymoon sweet at the Ritz Carlton hotel. The best prank call was when I called Rachel in the car because Sarah dropped me off first. So Rachel answers and I'm like this is baskin robins and Rachel goes hi Maddy. She tells me that she has caller ID and I didn't block the number. Everyone was laughing and I was on speaker. I promised her that i would prank call her tomorrow with caller ID at nationals. It was a pretty fun night. It was one of those night were i wish it didn't end. It felt like a pretty wild and crazy road trip.

Well of to bed. First day of nationals tomorrow. GO MISSION BAY!!!

<3's Always
M.

I'm offically a SOPHOMORE!

So today I officially became a SOPHOMORE!

I had my TPOL today which we do instead of finals and I was freaking out so bad. When it came time to go I felt like I was just repeating myself over and over. Then when it came time for the teachers to ask questions I felt like I couldn't answer them at all. In the end my teacher was like how does it feel to be done with ninth grade and officially be a sophomore. I didn't say anything. Then he was like aren't you happy and relieved? I said yay in a non happy way and left. I thought they were going to fail me but, my friend Amber told me I did great and then people in my class said that my teacher said I passed. I feel like I could of done better but, I'm still really proud of myself for making it through this year!

Then I went shopping with my best friend Amber and I got some new jeans from PAC SUN and surprisingly Ive never been there before. Amber was in shock. During the rest of the day I wasn't making sense and Amber and other people weren't sure if I should of passed ninth grade or not. Part of me agrees with them.

Tomorrow Amber is going and I wish her the best of luck and I know she will do awesome!!!

Today was also our last day volleyball practice and then off to NATIONALS for four days! Practice was really fun and I was a little hyper.... just a little if you want to put it that way. We did the hoedown throw down and had a cartwheel, round off and handstand competition and we climbed a tree. It was pretty fun.

I feel like today was a good day. I passed ninth grade, hung out with my bff, went to volleyball and talked to some pretty awesome people too. Hope today was a wonderful day for others also.

<3's Always
M.

The end of the first chapter

I decided to start a blog about myself and my journeys. There are two women who also have blogs that inspired me to start one.

It has come to an end of ninth grade with laughter, joy and smiles. Though I had my up's and down's I am thankful for everything that has happened in my 9th grade journey. I have learned alot about myself and others, meet some wonderful new people that I hope I will continue to have some wonderful times with.

I have my TPOL tomorrow and I'm actually pretty confident about it but, at the same time nervous all thanks to amber! I'm so glad ninth grade is coming to an end but, at the same time really sad, part of me doesn't want it to end. I cant wait for tenth grade to see what will happen and the new challenges and adventures that await!!!

Wish me luck on my TPOL.

<3's Always
M.